God’s guidance leads Br. Nick through life’s detours

Br. Nicholas Baxter, OFM, didn’t always know where he was going but he knew he would get there eventually. 

In a life dedicated to Franciscan spirituality, he moved forward in faith and walked the way before him, uncertain where it might lead or what he would become. Seven decades after joining the friars, after seasons of hardship and growth, he looks back on his pilgrimage not with remorse, but with peace and fulfillment. 

“For a while, I had to make it on my own,” he said. “By God more than me, I managed to make it through. Somehow, it worked out, and here I am.” 

“Here” is at San Juan Diego Friary in Albuquerque, where he now lives alongside a dozen brothers. Growing up in post-World War II Indianapolis, he didn’t dream of checkered flags at Indianapolis Motor Speedway or becoming a war hero in a freshly patriotic America. At age 13, his dream was to become a priest and wear the Franciscan habit.  

“I had no idea what I someday would do as a friar,” said Br. Nick, who joined the Order of Friars Minor on Independence Day, 1955, at age 20.  

Arriving as ‘Fr. Nick’ 

At seminary, Br. Nick found a community with his fellow discerners and with the faculty. “I met priests dedicated to teaching us snot-nosed young kids who couldn’t care less for learning,” he said. “I admired every one of them and became friends with some. I enjoy today what they taught me 60 years ago.” 

After three years studying philosophy (“very strict and nose-to-the-ground,” as he described), then five years in theology that he described as a more relaxed feeling, an enjoyment of the journey – he professed solemn vows and was ordained. 

“It was like coming out of a tunnel – and now you’re a priest,” he remembers. “I felt like I knew everything, but I was naive and unprepared for life as a priest out in society.” 

And of teaching at a girls’ school. God’s plan challenges in unexpected ways. 

“I never expected to be a teacher,” said Br. Nick, who served as an associate pastor, chaplain and instructor at St. Francis Academy for Girls in San Antonio. “I learned a lot about myself and how to teach. However, I had no concept of how to walk into a classroom of 15 to 20 adolescent females.” 

Stowing the habit - temporarily 

This experience led to a greater awareness of his strengths and weaknesses, and he realized the need for change. He decided to pursue further education and ultimately earned a PhD. As Br. Nick focused on education, he put clerical life on hold. He temporarily stepped away from his ministry as a friar and eventually started working as a psychologist and therapist. Some of the changes in his life were hard to process. 

“How the (heck) did I ever get here?” Br. Nick remembers. “But I was there.” 

God accompanied Br. Nick during his periods of uncertainty and hardship, helping to light the way back to being a friar. Having God as a constant presence provided him with the stability necessary to return to his calling. Equipped to serve as both teacher and counselor, he was prepared to fulfil the purpose intended for him. He rejoined the Order on Jan. 1, 1999, started his counseling ministry at St. Joseph’s Parish in San Antonio, and later worked as vicar at multiple Wisconsin parishes for four years.  

He then returned to San Antonio as senior associate at Espada and Cabrini parishes. 

“It gave me something of an anchor,” he said. “It felt like a calling, something I had to do. 

“I didn’t realize it until I became convinced of the mystery of salvation and of God’s love for everybody, and for me. He had been there, showing me which way to go. 

“He still is.”